Mom’s can be…nice, but dull!
They have to follow that “mother book so closely.”
Don’t get me wrong, they wipe the pavement out of our scraped knees,
they put the carrots in our lunches,
they use their spit to wipe the peanut butter off our cheeks,
and even pack extra underwear to camp–
So we DO need them…
They don’t follow any “Father Book!”
They live life on the edge and
make their own rules
which makes life so much more…
I mean who would:
Teach us we don’t have to worry on the highway when there’s no bathroom, we can go off the side of the road?
Teach us how to squirt whipped cream in our mouth without tainting the squirt top with our germs?
Bring home all the sweet treats when ONLY asked to get milk!?
Play sugar-pack football in the restaurant while we are waiting for our food?
Let us wander at the sports store for hours playing with all the equipment, and not mind getting in trouble when the manager tells us to leave?
Encourage us strongly to ride BIG roller coasters…?
Wipe off the toast that fell face down on the floor, now salted with cat hair and floor goobers stuck in the butter, and say it’s fine–“Good Protein!?”
Teach us to wipe our boogers under chairs or on our socks but never eat them!?
Teach us how to manipulate our way in front of every line with one of us pretending to be sick or injured?
Teach us to pack our pockets with candy and drinks when we enter the movie theatre so we don’t have to pay so much for snacks?
Teach us how to make brackets for March Madness?
Get kicked off the field or out of the gym for sticking up for our team with GUSTO!?
Get the scary monster under the bed?
Teach us about the importance of pyromania and light the sky, the cat’s tail, and only a few trees with colorful fireworks!?
Show us that separating the laundry is a waste of time, and less cycles are energy efficient?
Teach us that late night television and snacking is one of the essential food groups!?
Carry all the sleeping little children from the car into their beddy-bies?
Who would pack the car for vacations like a puzzle?
Stop for ice cream before dinner!?
Show 12 year old scouts how to play real-man’s dodge ball?
Allow us to finish the game even though we got a concussion?
Write us school notes when we slept in because we felt “sick.”
Smash the evil hairy gigantic spider?
Sing songs on the car radio really loud?
Teach us to obey every traffic rule; except to stop at a stop sign, allow any car to get in front of you, talk on the phone while driving, speed when you need to get someplace, drive on the curb during a parade, and to follow behind an emergency vehicle to get through traffic?
Teach us that bags of chocolate chip are not for storage but for eating!?
Show us how to pickle for hours because one day in baseball you will be in one?
Teach us that pulling, scratching and shifting is disgusting for girls but not for boys!?
Show us how to aim?
Rock us to sleep with his gentle snoring?
Buy us those presents when Mom said “NO!” Like a BB gun?
Teach us that directions of all kinds were made for sissies?
Teach us that we can open any package by using our teeth?
Teach you to stop at EVERY 7/11 for a Slurpee, no matter what!
Teach us that you are never too old for toys as he powers up the chain saw?
Teach us that no one can survive without a hammer and duct tape?
That if you sleep with a throat lozenge in your mouth you won’t wake up with a sore throat!?
Show us that the pay off for work is to get paid money?
Ever take the place of a wholesome Dad hug which makes the world feel safe and secure?
Play piggy back over and over again,?…
Definitely Not MOM!
Yep, Thank Heaven’s for Dad’s.
We need them to show us how to really live…
WE CELEBRATE AND LOVE YOU!
HAPPY FATHER’S DAY!